Obama to ABC: Pat-downs worth the price

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Don’t worry about the TSA's invasive horrors. It’s Okay. USA Today reports that President Obama understands.

Whew... Am I ever relieved. And if I know one thing, you can trust USA Today. (I don't know about USA tomorrow, though).    (original story here.)

"This is going to be something that evolves. We are going to have to work on it," Obama says. In other words, it’s just a flawed technology, that's all. Sure it needs improvement, but because of expediency, there’s no time to improve it yet. What's the big deal? Until then, it's either leer or grope or don't travel. 

(Slap to forehead). Why didn’t I think of that before all this uproar about TSA turned into cries of perversity and boiling blood? Thank God I can stop yelling “Satanists!! Satanists, all of you! Darn you to Heck!”

All this finger pointing instead of weighing in all the facts first. Boy is my face ever red!!

This gives me renewed hope that one day the only one touching my junk will be me.

…Er, you know what I mean.

Don't Touch My !!@#!! Junk!!

(BTW, which idiot started this word “junk?” Why can’t I say “balls” or “privates?” I mean, gimme a break. JUNK? I have more respect for my genitalia than that! But I digress…)

Don't Touch My 
!!@#!! Zucchini either!!

FYI, "Touch my junk" is a phrase coined  by John Tyner, a 31-year-old software engineer from California, who resisted a 'groin check' at San Diego Airport which resulted in him being escorted from the premises.

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"I understand people's frustrations with it,” Obama says comfortingly, “but I also know that if there was an explosion in the air that killed a couple of hundred people ... and it turned out that we could have prevented it… possibly... that would be something that would be pretty upsetting to most of us… including me."  

I understand...

Including me…Wow...he included himself…Thank you for that, Barry Soetero! You just got to love him!  I am positively glowing inside with the President’s understanding. Of course it doesn’t change a thing, and he still isn’t going to do anything about it, simply because he’s not in a position to do much about anything except officially pardon a turkey on Thanksgiving. This is about the limit of his current powers. But at least now I’ve got my mind right. At least now I know how upset he would be if a plane blew up because I wouldn’t let some fat sweaty guy put his hand on my balls and my butt. Am I ever shamed. And to think in spite of his understanding of travelers’ frustrations and national whining, he still managed to have a happy Thanksgiving and cut his lip playing basketball. What a hero! Imagine the courage!

Apparently, demoralizing and sexually humiliating hundreds of thousands of tax-paying travelers, or radiating hundreds of thousands of people whose immune systems may already be compromised, or sexually traumatizing hundreds of thousands of children and teenagers and women is less important.

It’s a tough decision, Barry, but then it’s lonely at the top. Thank God you won’t be on that plane that …possibly…explodes, or ever have to have your junk ogled, or your wife’s, or your daughters’.

Whatever tragedies and traumas and perversities happen to the rest of us in the days, weeks, and months to come, what a comfort it will be to be constantly reminded of how safe we are...just in case we forget.

Thanks for having so much personal integrity, Barry...

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But wait, there's  more...

According to Joseph Schwieterman, a Chicago-based transportation expert, "Americans have yet to make any really major - (really major???! ) - sacrifices for their security. Pat-downs and scanners are minimally evasive, and there's even resistance to this, just 15 seconds of awkwardness." 

(from the dailymail in UK)

In other words, why are you so upset at a little bit of groping and feeling? It's only 15 seconds, fercrissakes...

Well Joe, exactly how long does it take to be groped before it qualifies as molestation?

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Strange slip of the tongue here. I believe he means invasive - perhaps transportation "experts" are not known for their correct use of grammar - but in another sense he is absolutely right. These pat downs and machines are minimally evasive. There is very little one can do to evade them!

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Pay no attention to that TSA man behind the curtain!

Getting Rich from the TSA Naked Body Scanners

I can't imagine anyone walking away from an airport TSA scan or pat-down thinking, "Boy do I feel safe! I sure am glad TSA is on top of things!"

With so much flack coming down on TSA, and all the flagrant related instances reported in the news, those that we are "allowed" to hear about anyway, you gotta conclude that someone is making lots of money here. Well guess what, congratulations! You're absolutely right! There are some people at the top who are making money hand over fist at the expense of your embarrassment. At the top of the list is former Secretary of Homeland Security, Michael Chertoff. Not only did he lobby heavily for the TSA bill that got this government-approved porno show rolling, he's also making money from selling the equipment!! Click here to read the story.

Way to Go, Ron
Ron Paul, 21st century's Don Quixote (and I mean that in a good way), lambasted the TSA in introducing his bill to deal with these money-making perverts. I've never heard him more irate and fed up. You can see the video here.

The only weak spot with Ron's speech is that he is not calling for the dismantling of the TSA program. That is a mistake. Instead, he is calling for TSA employees to be held more accountable or liable for groping too invasively. The language is not solution-specific, and presents a very gray area.

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And yet, somehow, this whole situation seems wrong, not just in the obvious ways, the intrusive Xrays and pat-downs, which are bad enough, but the fact that Americans are getting more horrified and "fed up" and outspoken with being sexually molested and viewed at airports than they are shocked and horrified at an illegal war(s) and its horrors that has gone on now for 9 - 10 year in its current incarnation, and at a government and corporate system that is so corrupt and devoid of compassion it is beyond "fixing." The lists could go on. But Americans are feeling it where it hurts the most apparently, not just metaphorically, in their pocketbooks, as you might think, but physically, in their genitalia and vulnerability to exposure.

"And Adam and Eve saw that they were naked, and they were ashamed."

Not that we should not be shocked at these TSA incidents. TSA is one more gross, perverted incident in a long list of many. But let us not rid ourselves of TSA and walk away dusting our hands and thinking, "Well, that's done, thank God. Now we can go back to our lives."

Be upset about TSA, and rightfully so. Be angry about it. Throw the bums out. And then use that same anger to go deeper, and throw all the other bums out as well, including Barry Sotero.
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