Goodbye Facebook...

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I just deleted my Facebook account. I have thought of it before for various reasons that have to do mainly with Facebook’s leaking of account details and information. I don’t know firsthand if it is true or not, since it has not happened to me personally (to my knowledge). Anyway, I have nothing to worry about. I haven't published any underwear pictures of me like Tony the Wiener, er, at least not that I recall, although I did accidentally turn on my web cam and stood in front of it naked and LMAO. (But I only made twenty disc copies for my closest  friends. Honest!)

I suppose if someone drops me an official-looking summons with a message that says, "Hi Mike, how's that wart doing on your right butt cheek...?   (click) LIKE!  (click) FRIEND ME...See you in court, baby!" ... then I guess I'll know.

Today I read a report from Bloomberg with the headline Facebook Used As Tool To Serve Court Papers. You can read it here.

“It seems only logical now that tools like Facebook or Twitter be used” to contact people who can’t be traced using traditional means, said Daniel Hamilton, director of Big Brother Watch in London, noting such efforts don’t violate personal privacy. “Now is it desirable? No.”

Interesting. They "don't violate personal privacy"...
That, of course, is debatable.

But that says it in a nutshell. My Facebook information can be used against me by someone else, someone I don’t know, someone who might want to serve me with papers not in my best interests. This has been done to others. It could happen to me. It could happen to you. After this, what else will Facebook be used for? It is already widely rumored, and probably true, that Facebook was started,  not by a young college geek with a bright idea nobody ever thought of before, as Hollywood has blissfully claimed, but by the CIA as a means to keep tabs on the world surreptitiously. The world. Not just the USA.

You may recall (or not) that once upon a time when Social Security numbers were invented, one's SSN was never intended to be used for identification purposes, only for government tax records. And we all know how far south that went. Can Facebook be far behind?

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"Although some people do not have an SSN assigned to them, it is becoming increasingly difficult to engage in legitimate financial activities such as applying for a loan or a bank account without one.^[12] While the government cannot require an individual to disclose his SSN without a legal basis, companies may refuse to provide service to an individual who does not provide a SSN."  
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_Security_number)
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Anyway, I’ve never been a Facebook "user." I’ve never divulged any information or pictures that I didn’t want to share out there. I’ve submitted a few “wall” posts and such, mostly pertaining to my blog site, Save My Brain. And frankly (to date myself), I never did "get" Facebook, and the way people communicate on it and somehow “master” its quirky way of communicating, if you can call it that, and somehow think this is the coolest thing since cell phones were reduced to palm size.

I realized early on that I would never fit in with this crowd. I received a strong impression that most of them have no idea how to converse in real time, but can be completely verbose onscreen. They talk but do not speak. They read but do not understand. They hear but do not listen. They inhale but do not exhale. They eat but do not chew.

Whenever I read Facebook pages, I get a dreamy, hauntingly familiar feeling that\there is a great big party going on somewhere, and if only I knew where it was...

How can you handle Facebook excitement like this:
--I'M GOING TO THE LAKERS GAME TONIGHT -- WHOO-HOO!!!
--DUDE, YOU TOTALLY ROCK!
--DUDE, YOU TOTALLY DO!!
--AWESOME!!! WHO'D YOU SUCK TO PULL THAT OFF?

Meanwhile, on some other page...

--I TOTALLY HATE IT WHEN MONSANTO MESSES WITH OUR FOOD!!
--HUH??
--WTF??
--GO TO TACO HELL, MAN. TOTAL QUALITY CONTROL
--TACO HELL?? DON'T YOU MEAN TACO...NEVER MIND, I TOTALLY GOT IT...LMAO
--QUIT DISSING MONSANTO DUDE!
--YEAH, DUDE.
--GIVE HIM A BREAK. HE'S JUST TRYING TO MAKE A BUCK LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE.
--WTF IS MONSANTO? IS HE RUNNING FOR MAYOR OF NEW YORK OR SOMETHING?
--SPEAKING OF NEW YORK, I SAW KILLER HERSHEY SQUIRTS TOTALLY LIVE! THE MOST TOTALLYEST AWESOMEST BAND EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!

--DUDE, YOU TOTALLY ROCK!

--DUDE, YOU TOTALLY DO!! 

--AWESOME!!! WHO'D YOU SUCK TO PULL THAT OFF? 

In the modern world, internet conversation is often about shock value, like saying something that proves that you sometimes leave your house with your eyes open and moving, whereas  live conversation (you know, "real time")  is more about filibustering with rap-like platitudes, as opposed to speaking full sentences that demonstrate that one has graduated from K-8. Perhaps the origin of this comes from the rules of British Parliamentary Procedure. Whoever has the floor talks, and keeps on talking until time is up or somebody else manages to grab the floor. Or on Facebook, until somebody presses the "Like" button and "Likes" you. If you can impress enough people you're in. Just like in real life.

I have read things on Facebook that were short and profound...and drew absolutely no response from others at all.

I have read boring mundane statements that drew cheers and commentary from those with equally mundane minds. Others simply clicked the  "LIKE" button.

I saw my niece's Facebook page, and incredibly she had 1450 friends! I looked at my page and was ashamed that I had only 6 friends. What's wrong with me? Oh woe. Oh despicable me! What a loser.

Anyway, good luck to the rest of you still on Facebook. I have asked myself, "Why do I want to be on a website that may be used to take my information and serve me some scary papers?" I don't hang out in front of lawyers' offices for this. Why do it on Facebook?  I am good with this. If I had a "LIKE" button on my desk I would press it.

Now that I have deleted my account, I must wait a full 14 days without returning to the Facebook site, and then it will be completely deleted. However (and this is extremely important, warns Facebook), if I should accidentally return to Facebook before 14 days are up, then I will melt into goo in  my computer chair and all my computer files will be deleted. Since I don’t want that, I guess I will force myself to wait.

To the rest of you still on Facebook, know that Big Brother is definitely watching you, so be careful when you parade naked in front of your webcam. When you are eventually served with a summons on Facebook someday (like for parading naked in front of your webcam), by then Facebook will have added some new apps, and there will probably be a “Serve Me!” button you can press, for convenience.

But if you want to delete your Facebook account, Facebook won't tell you how to do it - not directly. Why would they? You'll have to do as I did and Google -- "How the @#!!  do I @#!! delete my @#!! Facebook account, @#!!  ?" and then you'll find out. You can't miss.

Goodbye to my 6 "friends". I hardly "LIKED" ye...
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