Dowling Duncan redesigns the US bank notes

     

Dowling | Duncan – Dowling Duncan redesign the US bank notes
(click for source article.)
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Barry Soetero, Christian Muslim
First U.S. Black President with
2 names and 2 religions...?

Welcome To Your New Money!!               
  
(Stirring, Patriotic music in background...)

Just in time for the demise of the dollar.

New and improved!! - Now More inflated!
Now you'll have less cash to lug around like the old days.
Remember those old bills... printed on all that depressingly green heavy paper? Weighing down your wallet, pulling down your sagging pants until someone thought you were Generation Y and called you "Dude!"?

And sooo easy on your purse shoulder if you're a woman or...
or... er...someone else who likes purses...

No More!

Now these lighter bills are worth less than ever before!! It's like carrying nothing at all!!

And the design! You just gotta love the inspired art nouveau.

Just imagine the thrill of slapping one of these Obama dollar bills on a counter and saying, "Gimme some change! Change I can believe in!"

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Okay. I'm not sure yet if this is actually happening, but the design by Dowling Duncan is real enough. The bid is out. It may happen.

The lengths of each denomination vary, supposedly for visually impaired people who don't know the difference between a twenty and a fiver. Not only can you can see the difference, you can feel it.

Imagine the joy and relief for those who must quickly handle cash in dark places like alleys and back rooms.

And they are vertically oriented, so that horizontally-challenged people counting cash won't wring their necks stiff from trying to see which...well, you get what I mean.

I'm not sure what's on the back side. Maybe "Federal Reserve Note," since I see no such distinction on the front.
Here are some other possibilities, or so I've heard:

• "In Fed We Trust...In God We Rust"
• "Way To Go, Woodrow"
• "Go Benny...Go Benny...Go Benny...Go Benny..." (in every corner)
• "Money? What Money?"
• "Ka-Ching" (in every corner)

Or... maybe there won't be anything on the back.
With all the recent criticism the poor Fed's been taking, maybe the Fed is going to start pretending that, like money, it doesn't really exist. You know, like an inferiority complex. Nobody loves me...

(sniff...)

What's a poor lonely central bank to do?
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Go to the site and click on each bill to see its actual size.

All I can say is...pdu!!
or if you prefer...
pdFu!!!

BTW, as a general rule, aren't dead presidents only allowed on bills?
I'm sure this hasn't escaped Barry's attention. Still...
Watch your back, BO...BS...or whatever your real name is...
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